How to Get...
1. Away with Murder:
Dual reference to the upcoming American Crime Drama show starring Viola Davis which tops my list of shows I shall be watching after my AS boards get over (you can check out the list on the Sidebar). Criminology has always been a fascination since I was a little kid and it is a subject after English Literature that I would love to major in. More than the thrill aspect I think what appeals to me is the cognitive projections of the Criminals and the nature v/s nurture of the crime and the criminal. Humanity is so flawed and very few of us manage to not get in touch with our ‘dark side’ but those who do fall deep into the cracks of this ruthless and ever so demanding society have different coping mechanisms which usually means leading to crime and deviance. Again this is subjective on so many levels.
Alternatively, if you do habour murderous tendencies then you can always become a writer. That’s one profession where you can go about with mass killing- Looking at you George R.R. Martin, and no law in this world will stop you. I mean, you can send children to battle it out with full grown dark wizards and let all the old heroes bleed to death (Ahem J.K Rowling). You can also create a sick stimulation and pool in a couple of teenagers and let them battle it out, nice doggy style (Talking about you Suzanne Collins). Or if you want to be creative you can throw them off buildings or make them commit suicide and then is the guilty conscience kicks in, you can bring them back to life (Excuse you, Gatiss. I cried rivers because of you. You’re not spared either Moffat!)
2. Over a breakup:
Haha joke, you don’t.
It’s true, you don’t just stop liking a person altogether and forget every memory or moment or even the silly fights and frets you guys must have shared. It’s not so easy and definitely life does not make it easy. What actually happens is that you accept the reality of the situation and you make peace with it but here and there you will always find yourself thinking about your past relationships. Even if you have moved on to someone else, you mostly always draw comparisons between the ‘then’ and ‘now’. Again this depends on the nature of the breakup, if it was messy then the only thing you are going to remember is his/her name on your hit list but if it were mutual then you’ll remember the good times and ironically find humour in the bad times. That’s what I would do.
3. A Guy/Girl to like you:
You can’t. They’re all fictional.
And possibly dead.
Usually its spells or evil patriarchs or daddy issues (Ask Cassandra Clare, she’ll tell you).
Almost always the best character die of diseases: Cancer anyone? (Don't run away from me John Green, you made me feel blue and now I see red!)
4. As fabulous as Beyonce:
Keep dreaming cause that ain’t happening.
5. Good Grades:
I’ll simplify this with 3 steps:
· Open a book
· Study the book
· Shut the book because iiSuperwomanii is out with a new video. OMFG is that CONOR FRANTRA! TAKADA! Will study when I die…
6. Through your AS LEVEL Boards:
Laugh away at our misery other educational boards. As if IG was not a headache (which now seems to be a piece of cake in comparison) that wouldn’t go away, AS is the big bully that grabs you by your arms and shakes you till you see the world in fuzzy disconnected colours. If that wasn’t enough A2 is the bully’s mother who swears her ‘kid’ is the ‘easiest’ to get along with. Pfft, if only such were the case. Anyway for all those giving their AS & A2 boards with me this year October/November, I wish you the best of luck and I’ll keep you in my prayers. Who know Dumbledore might be lenient. I meant God sorry. I always picture God as old Dumbledory… All Hail Thee!